"Leave and cleave--different words, significant words.
When you exchanged your wedding vows, these two words became part of your life. But do you understand them? To leave means sever one relationship before establishing another. This does not mean you disregard your parents. Rather it requires you break your tie to them and assume responsibility for your spouse.
To cleave means to weld together. When a man cleaves to his wife they become one flesh. This term is a beautiful capsule description of the oneness, completeness, and permanence God intended in the marriage relationship...
...Years ago I heard a choice description of the coming together that is involved in cleaving. If you hold a lump of dark green clay in one hand and a lump of light green clay in the other hand, you can clearly identify the two different shades of color. However, when you mold the two lumps together, you see just one lump of green clay--at first glance. When you inspect the lump closely you see the distinct and separate lines of dark and light green clay.
This is a picture of your marriage relationship. The two of you are blended together so you appear as one, yet you retain your own distinct identity and personality. But now you have a marriage personality which exists in the two of you..."
(Taken from Quiet Times for Couples by H. Norman Wright)
I thought this was an accurate description of why Mike and I chose to do the increasingly popular unity sand at our wedding. We began our unity sand with white sand at the bottom to represent God as our foundation. Then we took turns pouring our sand into the bottle, I had blue and Mike had red. We each have our own layer of sand, but together they make a beautiful display--we each are distinct in our personalities. We will never be able to separate my blue sand from Mike's red sand--we have made our vows to each other, and to God, and that's something else that will never be separated.